Justin and I took a Baby Basics class tonight - I've tried pretty hard not to get too crazy reading all the different articles and books with every different opinion under the sun on topics I didn't even know I was supposed to be thinking of. At the same time, we don't want to be ignorant so we figured this would at least be helpful.
Not so much. I only feel worse now... sort of. The woman who taught the class started with the cliche there are no stupid questins, but very quickly moved onto leaving me questioning why I didn't already know that. Things I now know I'm already doing wrong: I planned on using a bumper in her crib; I would have used lotion and not vegetable oil if I were to give her a massage; I was going to use a positioner to keep her on her back; I'd planned on swaddling her in one of her receiving blankets to put her to bed instead of a burrito-blanket; I would have only burped her at the end of feeding instead of every 1/2 - 3/4 of an ounce - and didn't I mention no bumper?! Did anyone else use a bumper?!
She was so end of the world about everything too. Basically if we do one single little thing wrong, Baby Bail is screwed. This is something I've already known for some time, but I've been living comfortably in denial. The instructor was definitely an Uncle No Fun. Instead of leaving the class feeling confident that we would be able to figure it out and handle the unknown, I left cranky and doubtful.
-which is better than feeling violated like I will be by the end of the day tomorrow after my OB appointment. She's going to start checking if I'm dialted. That's been another part of my living in denial, I haven't had to use the stirrups at all so far, and I was hoping I'd only have to when Baby actually comes. And if that weren't enough, I also have to get a Group B Strep test where, for those of you unfamiliar, I just recently learned they swab the vajayjay and around the badonkydonk. They didn't do all this to the women on the Oregon Trail, and they had babies all the time! frickin' geez...
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3 comments:
Miss...er...Mrs. Dana.
Your posts make me smile every time I read them. However this one had me laughing so hard, my cheeks hurt.
Sister Sandy says, “Vegetable oil? Baby bumper? Burritos and burping? What are you going to do, have a stir fry while bowling and eating Mexican food? Sheesh, I have a lot to learn about babies. Just know that when Baby Bail gets here, follow your heart. It’ll know what to do!”
Miss you!
-Sister Sandy
I did all of the above mentioned "no-no's" and guess what??? Gavin is healthy and almost 3!! And Emme survived her first year!! She turned one yesterday!! Remember... you are the mama!!! YOU KNOW BEST!!! And no book, or class, or teacher can make you better at what God has already put in you! Baby Bail will teach you as you go! Relax and screw Uncle no fun!!
Seriously...bumper or no bumper. Mine had them-you can make yourself crazy thinking of all the rules...but seriously, you'll just know. I promise. You'll be great. How much longer?
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