Them are fighting words

Today I experienced a serious case of mama bear when I took Bella to a bounce house playroom. I was already at a disadvantage to the day when I forgot the umbrella stroller so had to carry Austin in the baby bjorn atop of my pregnant belly. (super comfortable… false.) Bean was doing really well, playing far more fearlessly than I thought she would, even trying games I thought she’d be far too little for.

She was in an actual bounce house really enjoying herself when she wasn’t being knocked over by an overly aggressive boy who must have had seven pixie sticks before coming. I told her when she got knocked down to just get up quickly and move to an area not as many kids were playing. It was working wonderfully until she was knocked down and pinned by a little girl in the middle of the mat. She didn’t cry but was obviously upset so when a group of boys bounced them and the girl was knocked off Bell tried to get up and move. Then the girl tackled her and pinned her by lying on her face – again.

The girl was no bigger than Bella but my girl wouldn’t fight back so she just laid there eyes locked with mine and an uncomfortable, confused and scared look on her face as this girl pinned her and kids bounced around her. I started yelling at the girl trying to get her attention and when she looked up I saw that she had Downs Syndrome – she smiled at me then placed her attention back to her task at hand, smothering my daughter. A little unsure what to do I looked around at the other moms watching their kids and demanded to know whose daughter the girl in pink was… nothing.

By this point Bella had managed to try to get up again after the girl fell off after a bad bounce, but was unable to get away prior to being knocked over and laid on again by Pink Lady. I was seriously pissed because Bella was starting to cry and get frantic so I started unsnapping Austin from the baby bjorn ready to climb in after her when Bell was finally able to get away after she fell off again.

Her mom finally came over and came up to me after getting her daughter out of the bounce house and asked me not if Bella was okay but what the problem was. Ummmm where do I start? So I explained what had happened and she blew it off excusing her daughter for not knowing what she was doing. Like hell she didn’t know what she was doing – she may not have known what she was doing was wrong, but that’s this mom’s fault. Instead I just told her she obviously needs to be keeping an eye on her kid more if she behaves aggressively and doesn’t know that it’s wrong. Not what the mom wanted to hear, not that I care, and she started to lay into me a little and I just walked away with Bella in hand. My blood was boiling for hours and I kept coming up with retorts I coulda/shoulda/woulda said… I know I’m better for not saying anything, but I came up with some good stuff!

I know that you shouldn't judge someone without walking a mile in their shoes, and I can't even imagine raising a child with additional obstancles to overcome... but it was especially frustrating because instead of making it a teaching moment she enabled it with quick excuses and I wonder how long she'll continue doing that and to what degree. You don't have to do as I do, but if you're not willing to teach your child right from wrong what does that set them up for? ugh.

Anyway, I’ve realized recently that I have to start legit parenting now… more than making sure they’re still breathing by each birthday. Bella was watching me as I talked to that other mom. I want her to know that I will always always have her back and support her, but I also need her to see me be kind to someone making me mad since I continuously tell her to be kind to others. I have to set an example, because her little eyes and ears are watching and retaining things now.

Pressure’s on.